When you think you have life figured out, so many things are not going well in your head. While it pays to be optimistic the majority of the time, you’re lying to yourself when you think that it can continue on indefinitely on a level track. I have neglected this blog for too long, and when I saw myself slipping, I was content to carry on and not do much of anything while my life started this slow decline while I was living in Midland-Odessa.
So about September of last year, I was laid off at my oilfield job. We saw this coming, and many of us were already looking for a new place to land. It was at this time that I saw that no matter where I landed, I would have to work harder than I was already working. While this sounds like something that can be easily overcome, in practice, it is hard to break habits-good or bad ones. I was ready for a new challenge.
I’m not going to stand on here and make more excuses than I need to. I’m trying to look through the oculus of my mind and see where exactly I went wrong, while maintaining a level and sane mind. It’s one thing to archive, it is another to wax nostalgic–blurring the lines is often easy to do.
So I started a new job. It wasn’t the best type of job, nor was it a job that I should have taken. I say this, after finding out that in separating, I may need legal conflict to resolve the aftermath of it all. I’m not looking forward to this, but at the time, I just wanted to find a job.
As I’m typing this, Monday looks like I will be starting paperwork for a new vocation. One not in trucking, not in oil. This is a departure from the field that I thought I wanted to stay in. The stance that I have had to mentally fix myself in, I’m beside myself wondering if this is some odd dream, or nightmare. Hundreds of good people I know are having to do this, leave great middle-class jobs, temporarily and hope for the best, as the nation seems to implode and try to revert, or retard itself into socialism. We aren’t willing to settle for less, but as the job market continues to tighten it’s descent into the death spiral, it is harder to see many of the options, that our way of life is so famous for making possible to the Everyman.